LOL, that was my Akita when grandma (mom) took him. Long story, couldn’t keep him any longer. “Shalafi, I am NOT going to take that dog!” Well, she did. 130lbs. of black bear wandering around the house.
After hip surgery: “Oh Shalafi! He’s just too big! He might knock me down!” Guess who got knocked down when I came home to visit. Beast knocked me flat while not laying so much as a whisker on her walker. Didn’t so much as brush her walker with that monster tail. In a 8’x 8’ entryway. That was something to witness. From the ground.
“Oh he just barks and barks when strange men come around the house! I don’t know what to do with him!” Yeah, bet you hate having a dog with the lungs of a dragon going off at “strange men about the house”. 🙄 Yoshi sounded like some Resident Evil shit going down on the other side of the door.
He did stress her out by plopping down on the freezing concrete patio and refusing to come in, even covered in snow. “Mom, they were raised in northern Japan to hunt bears. He’s LOVING this!” LOL, did not compute for her.
And being an Akita, he was perfectly patient and loving with little ones. Slammed a bottle of gin and cried forever the night mom told me he was gone. Gods I got funny stories about that animal.
Peer reviewed by my neighbour’s dog. She’d probably add “even if you see no threat, and even if you don’t give a fuck about humans, it’s better to bark anyway just to be safe”. Except in posh paper speech.
HonoraryMancunian@lemmy.world
on 29 Jun 09:02
nextcollapse
I live in a kind of steal-y neighborhood, and not that I got a big neurotic dog for this reason, but I haven’t had anything taken since Ronda and I teamed up.
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LOL, that was my Akita when grandma (mom) took him. Long story, couldn’t keep him any longer. “Shalafi, I am NOT going to take that dog!” Well, she did. 130lbs. of black bear wandering around the house.
After hip surgery: “Oh Shalafi! He’s just too big! He might knock me down!” Guess who got knocked down when I came home to visit. Beast knocked me flat while not laying so much as a whisker on her walker. Didn’t so much as brush her walker with that monster tail. In a 8’x 8’ entryway. That was something to witness. From the ground.
“Oh he just barks and barks when strange men come around the house! I don’t know what to do with him!” Yeah, bet you hate having a dog with the lungs of a dragon going off at “strange men about the house”. 🙄 Yoshi sounded like some Resident Evil shit going down on the other side of the door.
He did stress her out by plopping down on the freezing concrete patio and refusing to come in, even covered in snow. “Mom, they were raised in northern Japan to hunt bears. He’s LOVING this!” LOL, did not compute for her.
And being an Akita, he was perfectly patient and loving with little ones. Slammed a bottle of gin and cried forever the night mom told me he was gone. Gods I got funny stories about that animal.
I’m pouring one out for all the good ones we’ve lost along the way.
Chewey Words not Keywords
.
.
Bad news: this article was retracted for fraud after the journal discovered the author wasn’t actually a dog.
It was written with the help of BarkGPT
Bark Great Pitbull Terrier
ChienGPT.
He should’ve published it over the internet.
not enough about barking!
Quality Post
Time to go home, Matt U ಠ ಠU
Hahaha
Peer reviewed by my neighbour’s dog. She’d probably add “even if you see no threat, and even if you don’t give a fuck about humans, it’s better to bark anyway just to be safe”. Except in posh paper speech.
99.999 recurring % lol
Here’s the full read
Just look at that data…
Now if only there was a way to negate the need for the bark defense… 😓
Nice, thanks!!
Hard to argue with the threat matrix decision chart in there. Dog did sound research.
Jokes aside, one of the best deterrents to break-ins is a dangerous-seeming dog.
I live in a kind of steal-y neighborhood, and not that I got a big neurotic dog for this reason, but I haven’t had anything taken since Ronda and I teamed up.
Wait, the dog doesn’t like Matt? That’s a huge red flag, Emily. Dogs know. Take it seriously.
Dog’s gonna have to write another abstract on why matt should not be allowed to move in.
100% effective dragon and vampire repellant too.
And terminators
Nope. Too many people making skynet. The dogs and goggles will do nothing.
<img alt="" src="https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/be6ef254-7c77-4b3d-9ae4-992c3100aaba.jpeg">
Wheely fabric box? She was going to do laundry for 2 hours and he thought it was 2 weeks? Or is it something else?
A suitcase?
Where is the rest of the paper? I need the rest
Midnitte@beehaw.org posted it above
jabde.com/…/the-bark-defense-a-99-999-successful-…