I imagine this in the style of the narrator at the beginning of a Twilight Zone episode.
ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 31 Aug 17:54
collapse
Rod Serling, put some respec on his name.
phdepressed@sh.itjust.works
on 31 Aug 18:39
nextcollapse
Honestly, me and wife on that one. Sure we’ve tried it but neither of us really enjoyed it. So we haven’t done it again…doesn’t stop me from making the jokes though.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world
on 01 Sep 02:10
nextcollapse
eh, we’d rather give our full attention to each other than compete
What’s hilarious about this meme is that Konami delivered the code that unlock these secrets over 30 years ago. Up up, down down, left right, left right, B A B A, start.
Put your right foot in, take your right foot out. Put your right foot in, and you shake it all
about. Do the Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around, that’s what it’s all about
S_H_K@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 31 Aug 14:44
nextcollapse
All of this is useless if you don’t exite her nuber one organ for sex, ger brain. You get muuuch more if you find what’s the mood she like what is the scene she wants. This is an extra in comparison.
Look guys all I’m saying is useful to know how to get girls horny but better is ahow go get your girl horny.
bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de
on 31 Aug 15:42
nextcollapse
AnarchoEngineer@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 31 Aug 16:56
nextcollapse
If you ask Walter Freeman he’d tell you to go through the eye
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 31 Aug 22:40
nextcollapse
Neither.
Ask her to close her eyes.
(Probably does not really matter whether she does or doesn’t)
Using your finger, gently trace lines around the neck, jawline, down to the collar bone, around the breast, along the sternum, follow the bottom of the ribcage, cross to the hip… you get the idea.
Ideally, be somewhat unpredictable, teasing, double back a few times, mix things up … labor or modulate the instensity of your own breath a bit.
Pay attention to her own breath modulations, her twitches or squirms.
Also obviously works better with lighter, or no clothing.
Think of this as maybe drawing arcane runes, casting a spell… tell a slightly different story every time.
Remember the wise word of Dr. Frank-N-Furter.
Antici-
.
…
…
-pation.
If done correctly, the uh ‘slipper’… should be extremely eager to meet you by the time you get to it.
What you need to do is just start violently punching the wall while screaming racial slurs with a plunger up your ass. Sploosh.
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 01 Sep 12:56
collapse
I… have known a single couple, both of whom told me, separately, that they enjoyed, and I should try… ‘donkey punching’ … which is apparently smacking the uh, ‘recipient’, in the back of the head, right as climax is about to occur, because apparently this causes a more intense contraction/climax.
Personally, that sounds completely fucking insane to me, but apparently, different strokes for different folks?
oftheair@lemmy.blahaj.zone
on 01 Sep 19:20
collapse
That would need at lot of communication and safety to both see if someone or somemany is/are okay with it and to make sure it doesn’t result in severe damage.
Don’t just do it without asking and making sure to practise gently first, and set up other safety precautions, readers of this thread.
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 01 Sep 20:36
collapse
Hence why my opinion of being told about that was ‘that sounds completely fucking insane’.
Like… fuck, man.
Yeah, beyond the rather obvious ‘never even consider this without enthusiastic consent’…
You probably should just never do this.
I know people can be and are into varying kinds and degrees of pain during the hanky panky… BUT…
It would extremely easy for someone of… really just average strength for an average young male athlete… to punch someone, in the back of the head or upper neck… with enough force that you could cause serious brain damage, break their neck, fuck them up for life, potentially even kill them.
Like if you can’t tell, I’m more into the sensual stuff in the bedroom, maybe a bit of consented restraint…
… but I also have a black belt. Took over a decade to earn, been in a lot of kumite bouts, competed in several tournaments, watched a few more talented karetekas from my dojo go on to place in the top 3s of regional, national, international tournaments.
And … this idea terrifies me, any real martial arts competition I have ever even heard of would disqualify you from the match, and probably ban you for life for intentionally punching someone in the back of the head.
Its way too fucking dangerous.
oftheair@lemmy.blahaj.zone
on 01 Sep 21:17
collapse
Yeah, we have done some rough stuff before, but we wouldn’t do this.
There are just some things, even with RACK that cannot be safe and personally we don’t think they should be done at all.
Such things like choking even aren’t really safe and we definitely don’t really do them in our play and never would for real, we might fake choke where we never squeeze.
But yeah, pretty much, really try to avoid situations where harm could actually be done irreparably, and always have tools, methods, safe words and signs etc on hand.
Doing any kink, or sex without those things is not great. Not getting at you btw, just explaining things to any readers of this thread, safety first in any intimacy, but especially mental and physical intimacy.
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 01 Sep 22:25
collapse
100% agree with all of that.
The choking thing is…I’ve known a good number of people who just… dont understand that actually cutting off oxygen supply to someone’s brain is fucking bad, and does not really work like it does in video games and movies.
As you say, you… can grasp someone’s neck in a way where they can still breathe… I’ve known too many idiots who do not know how to do this and also do not know that it is dangerous to have done to yourself.
oftheair@lemmy.blahaj.zone
on 01 Sep 23:53
collapse
When we were at school some time ago we remember people doing it to themselves and making themselves pass out. We never joined in, but it’s likely they have breathing problems to this day.
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 02 Sep 01:03
collapse
Oh goodness, I didn’t realize I was talking with a plural system till just now!
Ah, either way, yes, I also as a kid in school … well I can’t say I ever directly saw it, but I definitely heard about other kids asphyxiating themselves for… fun?
Yeah, seemed like a bad idea to me as well.
… A mind is a terrible thing to waste.
oftheair@lemmy.blahaj.zone
on 02 Sep 03:34
collapse
Glad you recognised us for what we are and weren’t horrible about it. So many on lemmy are, sadly.
Ah, we actually did see it happening, but passed by them most of the time.
Yeah, we agree, intentionally causing irreparable damage to one or many’s self or selves is not a good thing.
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 02 Sep 04:01
collapse
I have actually in the past dated another eh… system within one body, ‘she’ had a primary identity/consciousness that was in command maybe 85% of the time, but a number of others would take over or emerge in various situations.
I guess the… totality of myself and all of the ‘alters’ (this was the term ‘she’ used) within ‘her’ body (afab body, but the alters were of varying genders, and pronouns, grammar is hard) … well we all did not end up working out as a ‘couple’ (… again, grammar) but I don’t see that as any reason to take my one experience with such a system and use it to just immediately negatively paint every other similar system I encounter.
I’ve been doing this on a daily basis since I broke my ankle. It’s surprisingly challenging.
I was hoping to cover the fact of this up with a factual, innuaden-lavey way to make this funny by the time I was done typing it, but no, today you just learned something about my routine.
DiskCrasher@lemmy.world
on 31 Aug 16:04
nextcollapse
I don’t even need to watch this to know exactly what this is. Motherfucker gave the best advice in the universe 30 years ago and it has improved my technique 1,000%.
caseyweederman@lemmy.ca
on 01 Sep 02:40
nextcollapse
I know it’s not the video(s) I’m thinking of, because that wouldn’t be on YouTube… But there’s one or two educational “porn” videos that were so fucking helpful for me.
One about giving oral in general, and another specifically about hitting the g-spot. That shit got me laid quite a bit in my 20s lol
Yeah, no. I knew I could end up biting through if I actually bit it as hard as I could. When I said I eat pussy, I wasn’t being literal. So there’s at least 1 person I know for sure I have been with but didn’t satisfy.
I thought it was more of a catchphrase than an actual technique. Angangangang
apotheotic@beehaw.org
on 31 Aug 22:30
nextcollapse
Better yet, ask them what feels good, and establish communication of pleasure. Your partner, regardless of genitals, will have a better time, and so will you!
Communication doesn’t need to be verbal - and I’m more talking about setting the precedent for communicating about pleasure as a practice. Being able to communicate about pleasure takes you a lot further in mutual pleasure than having a “trick”, yknow?
Well, even if the other person doesn’t communicate their answer verbally, you can ask verbally :) it is the most direct way to establish an open pathway for communication.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
on 01 Sep 13:23
nextcollapse
I dunno, I feel like recommending teeth in any discussion about oral techniques is a recipe for disaster. Moves like that should be reserved for venerated professionals.
petrol_sniff_king@lemmy.blahaj.zone
on 01 Sep 15:56
collapse
How do you get professional without trying.
Oh, that’s right, you practice on the banana.
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today
on 01 Sep 19:58
collapse
“They said I could become anything, so I became everything.”
boolean_sledgehammer@lemmy.world
on 01 Sep 15:21
collapse
Kind of is.
thatradomguy@lemmy.world
on 01 Sep 03:55
nextcollapse
I kind of made a dumb image in my head that isn’t physically possible but the motion indicators in the image made me imagine a guy with his dong already in and he’s somehow spinning while connected. It’s funnier in my head, I promise.
BlackRoseAmongThorns@slrpnk.net
on 01 Sep 14:13
nextcollapse
🚁🚁
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today
on 01 Sep 19:59
collapse
“You spin me right round baby right round like a record baby…”
petrol_sniff_king@lemmy.blahaj.zone
on 01 Sep 15:54
collapse
I saw loss before I saw anything else, I seriously need to touch grass
ICastFist@programming.dev
on 01 Sep 13:14
collapse
When you do that, you’ll feel like you’re recreating the steps of loss, one panel at a time
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today
on 01 Sep 19:56
collapse
Bursting through the doors OUTSIDE in a panic.
Looking at some random shocked person pointing toward the park.
Rushing to the park to see grass.
Sobbing uncontrollably feeling all the grass.
(I’m doing this joke from memory instead of looking up the original comic for reference lol)
Septimaeus@infosec.pub
on 01 Sep 12:06
nextcollapse
But not too much. It can get overstimulated if you lift the hood and lick directly. When in doubt, you can hand her the reigns so she can find the sweet spot. For example, if you apply a wide and flat tongue and reduce movement, she can work her hips until she finds the angles she needs.
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
on 01 Sep 14:49
collapse
When I saw the first two steps, I initially thought it was a guide for opening pills. I was like, “I wonder what hey will do with the powder inside… hold on, this isn’t a pill”.
UnculturedSwine@lemmy.dbzer0.com
on 01 Sep 16:38
nextcollapse
Took me a minute to figure out what this was. If I ever hook up with a man that has one, I’ll put this info to good use.
(edit oh yeah, you got to realise the person is looking for information from their relatives who then directs them to the library — because it’s the 90’s)
The alphabet is good advice, but more for finding the right “letter” for your partner and—this is crucial—sticking to it unless it stops working (sometimes things just shift and you gotta adapt).
threaded - newest
She still does not like it.
Hmu let’s find out together
Don’t know what to think of this honestly.
Just do it.
How do I hit them up though?
Dude your the Wizard Pope, you could steal my nose while I sleep, I just could ignore brain waves due to some nasty pasty things…
You will find a way!
Generally an upward strike is better placed on the jaw, that’s an immediate knock out for many
Okay let’s do it.
Some women just don’t enjoy receiving oral. Not when it is done wrong, not at all.
Also some men don’t enjoy blowjobs.
Imagine a life in which 69 is just a number.
That wouldn’t be nice
I imagine this in the style of the narrator at the beginning of a Twilight Zone episode.
Rod Serling, put some respec on his name.
Honestly, me and wife on that one. Sure we’ve tried it but neither of us really enjoyed it. So we haven’t done it again…doesn’t stop me from making the jokes though.
eh, we’d rather give our full attention to each other than compete
I’ll do whatever to get pussy on my face, women still embarrassed when doing it for some reason.
IT’S WHAT I CRAVE, IT’S PERFECT, JUST GO WITH THE FLOW.
Pretty sure I got myself one of those.
I thought it was for the finger.
If you’re only using a finger, you’re doing it wrong.
That explains what the arrows are for then. They seem quite misleading, I thought it was some sort of advice for animations until reading comments.
Explain
Clitoral stimulation
What’s hilarious about this meme is that Konami delivered the code that unlock these secrets over 30 years ago. Up up, down down, left right, left right, B A B A, start.
LMFAO, I’m pitching doing all those moves then pushing the clit like it’s a starter button. Which I suppose it kinda is.
Huh? I just see a bunch of blue arrows on a blank yellowish square.
Its gotta be somewhere…
My dumbass thought it was a slipper at first.
Oh. Ohhhh
Also works for slippers.
Thank you.
Ditto. The comments enlightened me.
Dancing in your slippers, right?
RIGHT?
First, keep your left foot firmly planted! Cock your right foot up like you’ve seen Michael Jackson do.
Next, spin your left foot around 360 degrees while jiggling your right foot like your heater’s on the fritz!
I thought it was this:
Put your right foot in, take your right foot out. Put your right foot in, and you shake it all about. Do the Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around, that’s what it’s all about
All of this is useless if you don’t exite her nuber one organ for sex, ger brain. You get muuuch more if you find what’s the mood she like what is the scene she wants. This is an extra in comparison.
Look guys all I’m saying is useful to know how to get girls horny but better is ahow go get your girl horny.
But brains are so icky!
Do I reach in through the nose or ears?
Both, preferably
If you ask Walter Freeman he’d tell you to go through the eye
Neither.
Ask her to close her eyes.
(Probably does not really matter whether she does or doesn’t)
Using your finger, gently trace lines around the neck, jawline, down to the collar bone, around the breast, along the sternum, follow the bottom of the ribcage, cross to the hip… you get the idea.
Ideally, be somewhat unpredictable, teasing, double back a few times, mix things up … labor or modulate the instensity of your own breath a bit.
Pay attention to her own breath modulations, her twitches or squirms.
Also obviously works better with lighter, or no clothing.
Think of this as maybe drawing arcane runes, casting a spell… tell a slightly different story every time.
Remember the wise word of Dr. Frank-N-Furter.
Antici-
.
…
…
-pation.
If done correctly, the uh ‘slipper’… should be extremely eager to meet you by the time you get to it.
Incorrect.
What you need to do is just start violently punching the wall while screaming racial slurs with a plunger up your ass. Sploosh.
I… have known a single couple, both of whom told me, separately, that they enjoyed, and I should try… ‘donkey punching’ … which is apparently smacking the uh, ‘recipient’, in the back of the head, right as climax is about to occur, because apparently this causes a more intense contraction/climax.
Personally, that sounds completely fucking insane to me, but apparently, different strokes for different folks?
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Donkey_punch
That would need at lot of communication and safety to both see if someone or somemany is/are okay with it and to make sure it doesn’t result in severe damage.
Don’t just do it without asking and making sure to practise gently first, and set up other safety precautions, readers of this thread.
Hence why my opinion of being told about that was ‘that sounds completely fucking insane’.
Like… fuck, man.
Yeah, beyond the rather obvious ‘never even consider this without enthusiastic consent’…
You probably should just never do this.
I know people can be and are into varying kinds and degrees of pain during the hanky panky… BUT…
It would extremely easy for someone of… really just average strength for an average young male athlete… to punch someone, in the back of the head or upper neck… with enough force that you could cause serious brain damage, break their neck, fuck them up for life, potentially even kill them.
Like if you can’t tell, I’m more into the sensual stuff in the bedroom, maybe a bit of consented restraint…
… but I also have a black belt. Took over a decade to earn, been in a lot of kumite bouts, competed in several tournaments, watched a few more talented karetekas from my dojo go on to place in the top 3s of regional, national, international tournaments.
And … this idea terrifies me, any real martial arts competition I have ever even heard of would disqualify you from the match, and probably ban you for life for intentionally punching someone in the back of the head.
Its way too fucking dangerous.
Yeah, we have done some rough stuff before, but we wouldn’t do this.
There are just some things, even with RACK that cannot be safe and personally we don’t think they should be done at all.
Such things like choking even aren’t really safe and we definitely don’t really do them in our play and never would for real, we might fake choke where we never squeeze.
But yeah, pretty much, really try to avoid situations where harm could actually be done irreparably, and always have tools, methods, safe words and signs etc on hand.
Doing any kink, or sex without those things is not great. Not getting at you btw, just explaining things to any readers of this thread, safety first in any intimacy, but especially mental and physical intimacy.
100% agree with all of that.
The choking thing is…I’ve known a good number of people who just… dont understand that actually cutting off oxygen supply to someone’s brain is fucking bad, and does not really work like it does in video games and movies.
As you say, you… can grasp someone’s neck in a way where they can still breathe… I’ve known too many idiots who do not know how to do this and also do not know that it is dangerous to have done to yourself.
When we were at school some time ago we remember people doing it to themselves and making themselves pass out. We never joined in, but it’s likely they have breathing problems to this day.
Oh goodness, I didn’t realize I was talking with a plural system till just now!
Ah, either way, yes, I also as a kid in school … well I can’t say I ever directly saw it, but I definitely heard about other kids asphyxiating themselves for… fun?
Yeah, seemed like a bad idea to me as well.
… A mind is a terrible thing to waste.
Glad you recognised us for what we are and weren’t horrible about it. So many on lemmy are, sadly.
Ah, we actually did see it happening, but passed by them most of the time.
Yeah, we agree, intentionally causing irreparable damage to one or many’s self or selves is not a good thing.
I have actually in the past dated another eh… system within one body, ‘she’ had a primary identity/consciousness that was in command maybe 85% of the time, but a number of others would take over or emerge in various situations.
I guess the… totality of myself and all of the ‘alters’ (this was the term ‘she’ used) within ‘her’ body (afab body, but the alters were of varying genders, and pronouns, grammar is hard) … well we all did not end up working out as a ‘couple’ (… again, grammar) but I don’t see that as any reason to take my one experience with such a system and use it to just immediately negatively paint every other similar system I encounter.
I hope all ya’ll are doing well!
.
.
minor spelling mistake
You need to go to the hospital right now. You’re having an aneurysm
Bro… Are you ok?
Her nuber one organ for sex: ger brain.
The real cheat sheet:
<img alt="How to write the letters of the alphabet" src="https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/e0f799a5-f567-4b62-a895-b982e8e48a32.jpeg">
Nice moves!
I can’t help thinking the Cyrillic alphabet would be better suited, though. BRB, have some research to do.
Remember though, capital letters. Don’t dot the i.
Wherefore?
…also j
Lowercase j takes you down to the taint
Jeremy Bearimy?
Was doing this on an old girlfriend and she busted out laughing her ass off. WTF?! The guy before me gave her our secrets!
Or she has another girl secret.
Nah, that motherfucker let out even more secrets. And she told me!
One time I fingered her a bit, but my hands up and head her head to kiss her. Laughing her ass off again!
“You’re just checking if it’s safe to go down there!”
Her ex was a traitor to all mankind.
But my hands up and head her head to kiss her.
Wat
You mean you don’t know the classic hands up and head her head to kiss her move?
“you forgot the R, you halfwit!”
Previous was from a culture with a caligraphic languange.
Ok I’m gonna try hiragana and katakana one day…
I’ve been doing this on a daily basis since I broke my ankle. It’s surprisingly challenging.
I was hoping to cover the fact of this up with a factual, innuaden-lavey way to make this funny by the time I was done typing it, but no, today you just learned something about my routine.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7790iQ6a4Q
I don’t even need to watch this to know exactly what this is. Motherfucker gave the best advice in the universe 30 years ago and it has improved my technique 1,000%.
Is it Robin Williams?
Sam Kinison.
I wonder if he ever got to realize that his lasting contribution to humanity was going to be improving the sex lives of several entire generations.
I know it’s not the video(s) I’m thinking of, because that wouldn’t be on YouTube… But there’s one or two educational “porn” videos that were so fucking helpful for me.
One about giving oral in general, and another specifically about hitting the g-spot. That shit got me laid quite a bit in my 20s lol
What am I looking at?
Clitoris
Ok good, my brain was trying to convince me this was a sneaky Loss
I thought it was a way to fix a slipper…
I’ve been shopping for new warm slippers since it’s going to get colder.
How did multiple people think that? I thought it was for animating cartoon eyes.
Behold a man
Joycon drift.
my dumbass trying to figure out why you’d want to rotate your house slippers:
(this is why I’m single isn’t it)
Me too 🤣
Yeah, same. I chalked it up to the homosexuality, but I’m not sure after reading some of the comments.
i have the lesbian flavor of homosexuality you’d think that’d help me realize lol
I showed it to my brother who’s flavored straight vanilla and he didn’t get it, either. I’m glad to know we’re not alone. Lol.
Step 1: inspect
Step 2: push hood up
Step 3: rotate clitoris counterclockwise 360 degrees
Step 4: spin clitoris around central axis left and right.
Up up down down left right left right B A B A
Open the maintainance hatch, unscrew the old clitoris and swap it out for a new one.
Might as well check the oil while you are at it
Congratulations! You spawned the Hydra in GTA:SA
If the mouse isn’t going anywhere, either adjust the sensitivity or buy a new nub
quick cheap option is my shameless self insert post here:
lemmy.world/post/34593380
(Oh wait… you were talking about that other clit???)
For more information check the (wo)man page clit(1)
Or the Arch Wiki
step 1: bop it
step 2: twist it
step 3: pull it
step 4: find a new partner
I was once with a girl who wanted me to literally bite hers as hard as I could. 😵💫
The human jaw is easily able to bite through soft flesh, so I hope you didn’t…
Yeah, no. I knew I could end up biting through if I actually bit it as hard as I could. When I said I eat pussy, I wasn’t being literal. So there’s at least 1 person I know for sure I have been with but didn’t satisfy.
Pretty sure whatever you did was more satisfying than biting it off.
CHEW ON THAT THANG
I thought it was more of a catchphrase than an actual technique. Angangangang
Better yet, ask them what feels good, and establish communication of pleasure. Your partner, regardless of genitals, will have a better time, and so will you!
That only works if they actually answer. Sometimes it’s just easier to gauge reactions.
Sometimes they can’t talk coherently *wink wink*
Communication doesn’t need to be verbal - and I’m more talking about setting the precedent for communicating about pleasure as a practice. Being able to communicate about pleasure takes you a lot further in mutual pleasure than having a “trick”, yknow?
Yeah well, you said to ask, while the actual point is “listen” (and “feel”), that is what I meant
Well, even if the other person doesn’t communicate their answer verbally, you can ask verbally :) it is the most direct way to establish an open pathway for communication.
Yeah my problem in the past has been that they may be embarrassed to answer or just not know what to ask for
For sure, but that’s kinds the point in a way, you identify that communication is an issue and you can work on it :3
Completely agree. Communication is the basis of all good relationships and interaction, especially intimate interaction.
Fun fact most girls like when you suck it as well
They do not enjoy when you blow a raspberry onto it, however.
Sucking only. No blowing. Do not reverse the polarity.
<img alt="" src="https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/aa5a6020-7f7a-4e82-932e-2c5cc853de07.gif">
I’ve had several positive feedbacks when sliding it between front teeth and tongue. Not to be done immediately, but after she gets going a bit.
Be careful of course. And remember to check your teeth for hair afterwards.
I dunno if I’d be recommending teeth all willy-nilly to potential first time spelunkers…
Didn’t seem willy-nilly
I dunno, I feel like recommending teeth in any discussion about oral techniques is a recipe for disaster. Moves like that should be reserved for venerated professionals.
How do you get professional without trying.
Oh, that’s right, you practice on the banana.
Yeah, its more teethy-weethy
Yeah teeth is a pro move only
I spent way to much time thinking that was a pink slipper. The first two made sense but then I was lost.
Ditto, I figured it was one of those dance step guides.
<img alt="" src="https://mander.xyz/pictrs/image/480c5d2a-17d6-44e1-9812-7f95d3bf301a.png">
“They said I could become anything, so I became everything.”
Kind of is.
I kind of made a dumb image in my head that isn’t physically possible but the motion indicators in the image made me imagine a guy with his dong already in and he’s somehow spinning while connected. It’s funnier in my head, I promise.
🚁🚁
“You spin me right round baby right round like a record baby…”
I can see into his head, it’s pretty funny.
I saw loss before I saw anything else, I seriously need to touch grass
When you do that, you’ll feel like you’re recreating the steps of loss, one panel at a time
Bursting through the doors OUTSIDE in a panic.
Looking at some random shocked person pointing toward the park.
Rushing to the park to see grass.
Sobbing uncontrollably feeling all the grass.
(I’m doing this joke from memory instead of looking up the original comic for reference lol)
But not too much. It can get overstimulated if you lift the hood and lick directly. When in doubt, you can hand her the reigns so she can find the sweet spot. For example, if you apply a wide and flat tongue and reduce movement, she can work her hips until she finds the angles she needs.
Oh, that’s what that was…
When I saw the first two steps, I initially thought it was a guide for opening pills. I was like, “I wonder what hey will do with the powder inside… hold on, this isn’t a pill”.
Took me a minute to figure out what this was. If I ever hook up with a man that has one, I’ll put this info to good use.
My brain immediately skipped to that episode of Friends where Monica learns that Chandler got advice from Joey about licking the alphabet.
American Pie (1999) Sex Bible
(edit oh yeah, you got to realise the person is looking for information from their relatives who then directs them to the library — because it’s the 90’s)
The alphabet is good advice, but more for finding the right “letter” for your partner and—this is crucial—sticking to it unless it stops working (sometimes things just shift and you gotta adapt).
I’ll never know, but I trust your judgement xD
I do hexadecimal but the principle is the same.
What a strange diagram of some slippers.
I thought way to long about slippers.
“the move” from Seinfeld finally revealed. But you are supposed to end with a swirl.
Peter?
clit.
Info guide on how to lick a clit. Top is the clitoral hood, bottom is the clit itself
i thought it was about hour up make slippers fit. amazed how far I was.
Why is she standing in front of a blank sheet of paper?
What kind of animal just does counter clockwise.