A tense moment.
from fossilesque@mander.xyz to science_memes@mander.xyz on 04 Dec 18:42
https://mander.xyz/post/21513451

#science_memes

threaded - newest

jabathekek@sopuli.xyz on 04 Dec 18:51 next collapse

Disease McDiseaseface

ininewcrow@lemmy.ca on 04 Dec 19:33 next collapse

Doctor: HEY! … I know what to do! … Let’s make a website and ask the public what we should call this disease! We’ll get a sponsor and turn it into a fundraiser and awareness campaign. We’ll get everyone to vote on it and the one with the most votes will have the disease be called that name. What could go wrong!

Voyajer@lemmy.world on 04 Dec 20:12 collapse

Unalive disease

Irelephant@lemm.ee on 04 Dec 18:52 next collapse

Really, the doctor would probably not see anything recognisable, and ask the patient if they think they are making it up, or if they’re a woman, that its their period.

JoeyHarrington@lemmy.ca on 04 Dec 19:33 next collapse

Hysteria

IndiBrony@lemmy.world on 04 Dec 20:00 collapse
FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone on 04 Dec 19:49 next collapse

Yeah. Stop pretending the healthcare system has the resources to deal with unknown diseases.

If they can’t find a diagnosis, you’ll get told that you’re probably anxious or depressed, or malingering, and get told to exercise and eat healthy. This is what I was told when I was literally bedridden for a year by an undiagnosed neurological disease.

It’s a pretty horrible position to be in. My disease which is relatively common but not taught in most med schools took me three years and 23 doctors before I got diagnosed, even though diagnosis is based on fairly simple clinical observations.

obinice@lemmy.world on 04 Dec 22:36 next collapse

the healthcare system

Kinda sounds like you’re refering to a particular country’s healthcare system (whilst assuming OP meant this same one), but you didn’t specify.

You could be talking about Brazil, Kenya, New Zealand, even France. Without that bit of info, it’s hard to learn much from what you’re sharing.

Anyway, bloody awful what happened to you, madness! I hope once you got your diagnosis that things improved, and that you’re doing grand these days :-)

FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone on 04 Dec 22:43 collapse

Having worked for advocacy groups for my disease, this is literally a universal issue and affects even the best systems. The only cases where this tends not to be an issue are extremely expensive private doctors who take all the time in the world to investigate for you.

OmegaLemmy@discuss.online on 05 Dec 08:28 collapse

Yeah, even with a great public system not every doctor can look after a patient with the same amount of care

I would assume that, however, private hospitals have better services in countries with better public healthcare since they would have less customers and would be inclined to serve the best of what’s possible

FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone on 05 Dec 10:49 collapse

It tends to actually be a worse problen in europe than the US.

In the US the problem is more that doctors tend to diagnose you with something you don’t have and prescribe drugs that won’t help you (pharmaceuticals thanks).

In europe, where the government strongly controls the medical system, the government has promoted rules that minimise the costs of disability benefits and delegitimise disabling illness as “hysteria” or whatever, so that the government doesn’t have to pay as much disability benefits.

Take the UK for example, Sir Simon Wessely, who based his career on claiming ME (and now Long COVID) are all in the mind, which was disproven later on. Where is he now? He was knighted by the Queen, serves on the board of directors of the NHS, leads the government’s Science Media Center. Oh and he also earns massive commissions on being a consultant for disability insurance companies.

His famous quote, which is linked to him advising UK parliament in the 90s, is “[disability] Benefits will actually make these patients worse” (because he believed they were malingerers). A quote that probably led to hundreds of deaths of people with ME starving to death.

brbposting@sh.itjust.works on 05 Dec 00:00 collapse

Oh wow

<img alt="" src="https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/d863db84-a6dc-420f-b49d-adfa5397dde3.jpeg">

Awful and I can even try beginning to imagine the kinds of things patients affected might be told by doctors… (“I get tired too, …, get more sleep before your next appointment”)

Wishing the best for you and the community

boonhet@lemm.ee on 05 Dec 07:35 collapse

I ha the the fact that the first half of it sounded exactly like me

However, as soon as it got to the hallmark symptom, I felt pretty lucky. I don’t have any sort of post-exertional crash or anything. I’ll be a bit tired but feel good

Default_Defect@midwest.social on 05 Dec 09:28 collapse

Yup, my arrhythmogenic cardiomyopathy went undiagnosed because my first cardiologist found it easier to just tell me to stop being fat. There’s more to the story, but if it had been caught then, I might not have needed a heart transplant later on.

TootSweet@lemmy.world on 04 Dec 19:14 next collapse

More realistically:

  • Patient: "Doctor, I got shot in the chest."
  • Doctor: "Have you considered it might be anxiety?"
  • Patient: "WTF are you talking about? Look, I’m bleeding out all over the floor here."
  • Doctor: "You’d be surprised what anxiety can do."
  • Patient: "Doc, I’m dying from A GUNSHOT WOUND."
  • Doctor: “Ang. Zai. Eh. Tee. Kthxbye.”
FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone on 04 Dec 19:52 next collapse

Ahhh capitalism, where insurance companies pay doctors to pretend everything is fine so they don’t have to spend money.

oldfart@lemm.ee on 05 Dec 08:05 collapse

This happens all the time in state funded healthcare too. It’s not about funding, it’s about mindset

HowManyNimons@lemmy.world on 05 Dec 11:46 collapse

At least in a state funded system there is the occasional connection made between a healthy population and higher productivity and GDP.

bdonvr@thelemmy.club on 04 Dec 21:26 collapse

Patient: “Doctor, I got shot in the chest.”

Doctor: “What, do you think we like healthcare CEOs because we’re doctors? Rest in piss bozo”

Patient: *dies*

uis@lemm.ee on 05 Dec 07:07 collapse

Soooooo, when is Universal Healthcare in USSA time? If you lack doctors, academics, ministers of healthcare, communists or all above, we can provide them.

Ashiette@lemmy.world on 04 Dec 19:26 next collapse

Doctor said, Son, you got Reggaemylitis

atocci@lemmy.world on 04 Dec 19:29 next collapse

…ligma

AntiOutsideAktion@hexbear.net on 04 Dec 19:53 next collapse

in the thumbnail the monkey puppets are about to kiss

bulwark@lemmy.world on 04 Dec 20:20 next collapse

Lou Gehrig and James Parkinson really dropped the ball as far as naming a disease goes. Way to make it all about you.

GenderIsOpSec@hexbear.net on 04 Dec 20:26 next collapse

“Ligma” or maybe “Sugma”

Assman@sh.itjust.works on 04 Dec 21:15 next collapse

I would like to name my very rare disease “a very rare disease”. It’s what Abbott and Costello would do

Malfeasant@lemm.ee on 05 Dec 22:16 collapse

Who?

Assman@sh.itjust.works on 05 Dec 22:25 collapse

Yeah, he’s on first

pewgar_seemsimandroid@lemmy.blahaj.zone on 04 Dec 22:07 next collapse

i want it called: 🤠🇳🇺💈🗿🧏🤫💀🍠🏕️👹

southsamurai@sh.itjust.works on 04 Dec 23:50 collapse

So, it’s called “the gay cowboy caught a disease in england at a barber shop, went to Easter Island where he begged to suck a dick on the down low, but it killed the guy so he hid the body in a cornucopia under tent, the horny little devil” disease?

bloubz@lemmygrad.ml on 04 Dec 23:55 next collapse

I’m pretty sure that’s not England, cornucopia and horny little devil

Not mentioning the weird dick thing

todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee on 05 Dec 01:16 collapse

It’s the Niue flag.

<img alt="" src="https://lemm.ee/pictrs/image/fb262464-8a42-4799-ae56-90ff28b6432e.jpeg">

bloubz@lemmygrad.ml on 05 Dec 08:12 collapse

Yes, it is

i_dont_want_to@lemmy.blahaj.zone on 05 Dec 00:34 next collapse

Rolls right off the tongue

pewgar_seemsimandroid@lemmy.blahaj.zone on 05 Dec 05:39 collapse

Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works on 04 Dec 22:34 next collapse

Suegon

shikitohno@lemm.ee on 05 Dec 00:27 next collapse

Closest I’ve come to this was twice, both from the same doctor. She was actually my favorite primary doctor I’ve had, up until my insurance changed and I could no longer see her without it being cripplingly expensive.

Looking at my lab work results, one time she goes, “This is really interesting, you’ve got all kinds of stuff going on, don’t you?” and another was simply “Woah!”

Even if she wasn’t generally pretty funny, would still be my favorite, since she pretty much nailed down diagnoses for several issues that had been ailing me for years within the first couple appointments, was great with giving me referrals and fighting with insurance about “Yes, this really is necessary, it’s in your coverage agreement, so shut up and pay!” and got me back up to some semblance of full health in a matter of months. Like, exhaustion and joint pain so bad, I couldn’t walk down the single flight of stairs to leave my apartment some days and migraines that made me have to lay in a dark room for an hour, to now just being generally always a bit more fatigued than I should be given the amount of stuff I do in a given day.

BluesF@lemmy.world on 05 Dec 07:35 collapse

I had a “whoa” once, or perhaps something slightly more extreme. The condition wasn’t, particularly - I had a lump on my finger as a kid. The first doctor said it would go away on its own, which it didn’t at all, 2 years later it was much worse and started to hurt, so back we went. The next doctor suggested basically that we just cut it open and see what it was lmao, so that we did. He sliced it with a scalpel there and then, while, me, the doctor, and my dad peered at it.

As soon as the scalpel went in there was a small explosion of goo from in there and both my dad and the doctor recoiled in horror (“whoa!” lol). He proceeded to poke around in the goo hole somewhat with a needle (looking back this seems like an odd way to do things) and fished out a ~inch long hawthorn that had just been in there, chilling for the past 2 years.

zqwzzle@lemmy.ca on 05 Dec 00:37 next collapse

“Hello, my colleague and I have discovered two new types of Lymphoma, and we would like to register them.”

“Certainly! Tell me your name, please.”

“Well, I’m Dr. Hodgkins.”

"Great, so we’ll call one ‘Hodgkin’s Lymphoma’. What’s the other doctor’s name? ".

“Dr. Ottovordemgentschenfelde.”

“…OK, ‘Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma’. Done!”

Red_October@lemmy.world on 05 Dec 06:57 next collapse

Do the right thing and insist that it be called Ligma.

BlueMagma@sh.itjust.works on 05 Dec 07:28 next collapse

Why ? (I didn’t understand the joke)

Cavemanfreak@lemm.ee on 05 Dec 11:24 next collapse

Ligma balls!

Soulg@sh.itjust.works on 05 Dec 12:22 collapse

Who’s Steve Jobs?

lennivelkant@discuss.tchncs.de on 05 Dec 19:03 collapse

It’s a common bait-and-switch joke. “I have Ligma” “What’s Ligma?” “Ligma Balls!” (The joke being that “Ligma” sounds like “Lick My”)

Maybe you’re familiar with a similar joke: “Hey, do you think it smells like updog in here?” “What’s updog” “Not much, what’s up with you?” (Here, the joke is that “What’s updog” sounds like “What’s up, dawg”)

PlexSheep@infosec.pub on 06 Dec 02:23 collapse

And the cure will be Firelfanz

Sparky@lemmy.blahaj.zone on 05 Dec 11:18 next collapse

“just Greg…”

buddascrayon@lemmy.world on 05 Dec 22:35 collapse

Lou Gehrig has entered the chat.